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It's Not About Me

Sondra Ajasin - Friday, February 17, 2017
It's Not About Me

I woke up this morning to a house full of boys. All loud and quite frankly pretty obnoxious. The three of them are amazing. Fostering is truly a emotional roller coaster ride and sometimes it just 100% sucks. BUT, watching my two biological children love and accept the one who has no blood ties to us as though he has always been a part of our lives is one of the most amazing blessings I will ever see.

The struggle of praying for his biological mom and dad and the desire to keep him in our home forever is real. The hard truth that I face every time that I pray is this: "IT IS NOT ABOUT ME". It's just not. My heart hurts at the thought of him ever leaving us but I know that if his parents could get their life together and love and protect him then I have to realize it is not about me and God never intended for this little boy's life to be turned upside down. God could heal the hurts and mend this family. If God does and this little boy could know his mommy and daddy then me stepping back would be the right thing to do and I would gladly, but sadly, do just that. Would it break my heart? Of course. I LOVE him like I gave birth to him.

Here is the thing about fostering, it is NOT easy. It is, however, the biggest mission field I will ever walk in. I do not need to travel the world to find a mission. It is right here at my doorstep. Children right here in our neighborhoods, in our city, in our county, in our state, in out nation need someone to realize "it is not about me" and step into the messy mission field because they are worth it.

If he stays a month, a year, or for the rest of his life; he WILL know what it feels like to be the center of someone's world. He WILL know what it feels like to have a Momma bear protect him and love him fiercely. While he is with us he will have everything he needs. He will learn what unconditional love is. He will learn what it means to be safe. He will learn that he has a voice. He will learn how to use that voice. He will learn that he matters.

My name is Sondra Ajasin. I am not a superhero. I am not special. I do not have a heart of stone that won't break. I am simply here to do God's work of loving the least of these and caring for His children. I am here to foster destiny in his life. I am here to foster hope in his life. I am here to foster love in his life. I am his Foster Mom. I wear that name with pride and joy. I stand with that title with my head held high and my heart beating strongly. He is worth it. They are all worth it. Won't you join me?

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